Slayer Hater: Sportbikers learning how to deal with cruisers that cross the double yellow lines

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Sportbikers learning how to deal with cruisers that cross the double yellow lines

Harleys unable to skillfully negotiate the 318 curves of the "Dragon" isn't a new issue, but sportbikers are learning how to cope. You've heard of counter-terrorism, welcome to the age of counter-slayers.

Sportbiker Alfred Upp has developed motorcycle jousting. Capitalizing on the medieval concept that seems to be so popular with cruiser riders, Alfred decided to show them that crossing center is potentially a capital offense. Alfred says, "I see at least 120 cruisers in my lane per pass on a Saturday. I'm all fed up!"

Photo caption: Alfred Upp is all fed up with cruiser riders that cannot maintain their lane and is seen here practicing with a fellow crotch rocketeer.

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So who is Slayer Hater anyway?

Slayer Hater knows what a biker is and you ain't it.
Slayer Hater doesn't drag knees at your rally, why do you drag your bike at his?
Slayer Hater doesn't come to your state and tell you how to ride your road.
Slayer Hater doesn't dig your entitlement attitude when it comes to the best piece of riding on the planet.
Slayer Hater would like to be able to carry on a conversation when you take off out of the parking lot on your v-twin super-dildo. Oh and even a monkey can twist a throttle, shithead.
Slayer Hater doesn't understand your religion.
Slayer Hater knows you're going to drop your bike negotiating the parking lot at the CROT. He just knows it.
Slayer Hater has no clue why you bring a heavy, under-powered, low-performance machine to such a challenging road only to ride at 15 miles per hour and wobble your way to the sticker counter calling yourself a "Dragon Slayer." Slayer Hater knows you don't know why either.
Slayer Hater is the poor bastard in the mirror for 6+ miles of the 11. How about "slaying" that pull off, r-tard?
Slayer Hater is not a "me," it's a "we." No really, it's a "we."
Slayer Hater doesn't even see what sort of bike you're on so long as you are in control of that bike, considerate of others and in your own lane. Be slow! Be on a cruiser! Just be in control! Should Slayer Hater even have to say that? Sad that we do.