Slayer Hater

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Heavy rains, lack of salt blamed for coming infestation

On the heels of some of the heaviest rains to hit the area in quite some time, scientists warn of an apocalyptic infestation not seen since the plagues of Egypt.

Heavy rains brought flash flooding to the area over the weekend and, scientists warn, washed away the beneficial salt that had been applied by TNDOT and NCDOT. "The salt had been keeping the pests away. With it washed away, there's nothing keeping them away. All is lost," lamented Chief Researcher, Benjamin Long.

Labeled "slayer slugs," the pest move very, very slowly and leave a slimy trail resembling oil behind them wherever they go. This would explain their absence in the past several months as everyone knows slugs don't like salt.

Officials expect record numbers of slayer slugs in the coming months and have no viable plans to ward them off.
Image caption: Scientists warn of coming infestation of so-called "slayer slugs"

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